The Fantard
by Mr. Havik
Summary: Part one of four of retro and vintage's challenge. Sub Zero meets his biggest fan. One-shot.


Disclaimer: I don't own MK except for any and all thing I choose to add to my whim.

A/N: Challenge from **retro and vintage**. One of my most half-assed attempts; the original excerpt was a thousand times more sophisticated. It'll be a miracle if she likes this.

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><p><strong>The Fantard<strong>

**By Mr. Havik**

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><p>"OMg I luv uuUU!"<p>

Sub Zero's fingers hovered over the keyboard, his mental struggle keeping him from replying safely. He had only heard fangirls were bad news but didn't exactly know how or why their reputation was as tarnished as it was. He instead reached under his helmet and scratched away the imaginary itch, thinking if typing an answer to her would have any repercussions or not. Oh, but he always was such a nice guy, making sure to never leave someone out and giving a second chance whenever he could. He couldn't realize it was a mistake before it was too late.

"Thanks," he had replied to which the girl on the other side responded with funny little emoticons that the Lin Kuei thought was very sweet for such a young little thing.

"u r sooooooooooo much moar hoter then scorpian!1"

He blushed. What a wonderful feeling it is to talk to a fan, he wondered, almost chuckling that the girl was so excited to be talking to him that she couldn't keep her spelling in check. Little did he know that the fat cunt on the other side was already rigorously masturbating with a broken pencil she found lying about. Seeing the sickening creature would have added to his nightmares than what he was already about to experience.

"Thank you very much."

"loll, wat r u doing?" she typed with her sticky, plump fingers.

"I was trying to establish an e-mail account for myself, but the process is too confusing."

"AWWWW, KAWAII!"

"What are you doing?"

"im Riting ff. net"

He was confused. What was a 'ff. net'?

"What is that?"

"lol! ff. et! im writing it on u an scorpian and noobsaibot!"

"I don't understand."

"OMG YAOI!"

Sub Zero narrowed his eyes till they formed into apprehensive little slits. Yaoi? What was she talking about?

"You are writing-" he paused, thinking that using "homosexual" and "porn" with an under-aged girl would be extremely inappropriate. He quickly deleted the comment and formed a new one. "You are writing yaoi on me?"

"YESS! plZ read it 4 me! I luuuvv u soooooo much!"

A small icon that of a document appeared in the chat box and the Grandmaster moved the pointer to click upon it. A new window popped up, revealing an entire page worth of terrible spellings and horrible grammar. He didn't know why he even bothered to read the text; after the ordeal, it had left him feeling sick, violated and raped.

_Subzero was like so fucking hot an super sexy and noobsaibot wanted 2 sex him. so 1 day noobsaibot grabbed him and he tore subzero clothes off. "what r u doing/?" subzero asked and noobsaibot said" im in love with you and no1 can have you but me. So he was naked and subzero was naked nad noobsaibot but his cock in him. 'noooo' subzero moaned as noobsaybot's hard and juicy cock came in an out repetetively.. noobsoibot then caem inside if subzero and it was hot abnd tired. noobsaibot kissed subzero on the mouth like hot and he was sweeting nd he sed "i'll keep ur dick wid me cuz u r mine, k?' noobsoit then took out knife and subzero was soo tired he cudn't get up and noobsaibot cut his man-part off. noooo! subzero said and he ran away. it was raining anf he was wet and water was making his muscled look sexy and delicious. he was at scorpain's mansion and dere was fire on the walls and the doorbell wasa dragon with a nose-ring. He knocked and scorpion came out and he was in his bathrobe becuz he was taking a shower…. Plz help me, my brother raped me,' subzero sihged bcoz scorpian was very sexy an he cudn't take his eyes of him. 'ill heal u,' screamed scorpian and he took off subzero's pants and he looks at the bleeding anf he is sad. WHO DID DIS I;LL KILL HIM!" scorpoan said and he take subsero and he puts tape on the dick! Scorpian then used his magic grow subzeros dick and it was relly big! 'I luv u and I will sex u!' scorpian yelled! he pushed subzero to the floor and he took of his pants and his cock was even bigger that noobsaiobt! subzero was afraid but he liked it when scorpioan put his cock inside him and he began to rape his. After scorpion aws done he put his dick in subzero;s mouth anf he begant to suck it and it tasted good-_

Sub Zero had quickly turned his head away to let the vomit spill all over the floor. He slapped the laptop down and ran from where he sat so he could heave the rest of his breakfast in the toilet bowl.

When he returned, he took the laptop in his hands and chucked it right out the window.

Like that would help.


End file.
